My bf is now in SMU pageant 2010. I don't know if i should be happy or not. On the surface, I am happy because i'm really genuinely happy for him and i'm proud of him. When he was in a dilema whether to join, I encouraged him to go for it cuz to me, it's like a now-or-never chance. And since it would most probably be his last education days, then i say, make it a BLAST! But being in such a contest, there's bound to be publicity for him, and sooner or later, more and more people will get to know this guy, my bf. I'm a pretty selfish girl i would say. I get paranoid easily. And i get worried easily. Maybe because I'm not confident of myself. Maybe because, i just can't trust him enough. As the saying goes, ALL guys, no matter how good they can be, can't be trusted... right?
Honestly, i don't quite remember when was the last time we walked hand in hand around town, or even, stepped out of tampines tgt. He was busy with his work then, now smu stuffs.. and i'm also busy with my own work. All that we do now when we meet up is to......................... EAT. Specifically, he looking at me eating my late dinner cuz he's now on a super ultra mega strict diet and exercise regime all thanks to pageant. The most we can ever do is to catch a movie at Ehub. W.O.W sigh. Pageant is really taking up quite abit of his time to a point, sometimes i feel neglected and irritated. Like, we can't meet because of... pageant. Photoshoot, catwalk trainings, photoshoot, catwalk and the list goes on.. And everytime when i start complaining about these, it all boils down to me again because right from the start, i was the one who supported and encouraged him to join. YEA SO OH WELL~ I kind of miss those old times, the really dating times sort of things. I would say he's someone who wouldn't take much initiative. It's always me asking him out, to watch movie, shopping, dinner, lunch etc. It's been a long time since he dated me out :(
He'll be flying to Taiwan tmr, back only on the 29th midnight, meeting me on the 30th to celebrate my birthday and...................... it'd be my turn to visit Taiwan on the 31st (5am reach airport thanks man -.-), only to be back 11days later on the 10th of Aug. I can't help but to say sigh.
PS: I don't even know if i would get to meet him later since he'll be having his catwalk training & then attending some friends' birthday parties that i don't even feel like going!!! And the next thing... he's flying!!!!! ARRRGHHHH!!!!
PPS: But in any case, I STILL SUPPORT MY OWN BF IN THIS PAGEANT!!! To those who are reading this space and will be in SMU Year 1, PLZ SUPPORT MY BF KKKKKKK!!!!!! :D Luv u all muackxx muackzz!!
still,
SIGH